Telescope eyes
by SonataForMyOverdosedLover
Summary: A short Deidara/Sakura story. Sakura is back to Konoha and to Team7, with a war about to begin. A fic about choices, friends and responsibilities; about gaining and losing ; about wearing blindfolds and hoping the next step is the right one.
1. Sora

This is a short fic that came out of the blue. As you'll see it is set in an AU and it will probably get you confused at various points. But in truth it isn't set on the action, on the contrary – what I wanted to do is to play a little with feelings, symbols and principles. So, as a forward announcement: You'll find here that the events take place when team 7 is somewhere around their twenties, the Uchiha massacre never took place, Sasuke did leave but he came back with Naruto, and with the Akatsuki on the move the countries came to critical times of war. And, relevant information, after both Naruto's and Sasuke's departure, some time after Sakura became Tsunade's apprentice she left the village as well to grow stronger and self-confident. Any other detail that confuses you, feel free to ask, but, as I said, I would rather have you guys see beyond the background.

Before going on I'll repeat myself (shoo, :P) this is a symbolic fanfiction, inspiration coming from music. - my hands kept typing as I was listening to a series of songs, which you will find in the chapter's name.

Therefore, this one is called 'Sora' ,after one of Yoko Kanno's songs. I recommend you to listen to it too - extremely beautiful song.

Disclaimer: Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto

**Chapter 1: **_**Sora**_

'_Where are we in this world?'_

'_What a funny question, kunoichi, mm! We are the world, yeah.'_

'_You and I?'_

'_Of course, un.'_

'_Then why can't I see you?'_

'_But you can feel me.'_

_I gently squeezed both of your hands in mine and leaned backwards to feel your back on mine. 'You're right.' I giggled. 'Your heart beats funnily.'_

'_mm.'_

'_Deidara?'_

'_Yeah?'_

'_You never answered my question.'_

'…'

'_Why can't I see you?'_

_Silence… Was that wind that I barely felt through my hair?_

'_Because we belong to different people, un; different worlds.'_

_One pair of our hands slipped apart as we both brought them up to our faces to touch the binding that was covering our eyes._

'_Do you mean that we are blind, Deidara?'_

'_No. We're just ...blinded…by them…'_

'…_different worlds.'_

'…'

'_Ah…I… I got it now. I understand.'_

'_un.'_

'_Deidara…?'_

'_What, un?'_

'…_nothing.'_

_We took each one step, and one step again until, with a gentle caress along the fingers and a last grip at the end, our hands fell apart and we continued walking further and further away._

_--_

_Ne, ne, Deidara I won't look behind because I am scared I won't feel your back on mine anymore._

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Oooo **I'm home** oooO

Maybe it was half because I felt homesick…maybe it was half because I got unlucky enough to cross paths with the perverted Sannin on his way to Konoha. And maybe braking down the door with a chakra filled fist wasn't such a great idea of an entrance. But one training arena filled with dropped jaws and Sasuke's eyes wide in dumbness really made my day.

"**Ta-dai-ma**!

Oooo **Hometown** oooO

I really missed it; the streets, the people, the clatter, the children's play in front of their houses... When you are away you think at it with so much nostalgia but only when you are back you realize how much you've really missed it. My hometown. This place that I, as a shinobi, swore to give my life for. I lowered my head to watch the dust that had settled on my shoes. My life…would I…the meaning of it…would I really be ready to give it when the time will come?

"Ne, Sakura-chan! What are you spacing out like that for in the middle of the street? Come in or we'll order ramen without you."

Looking up I met Naruto's goofy grin as he waved from Ichiraku Ramen Bar. I couldn't help but smile.

_Right Naruto, this is out town. If not for us, let's make a better future for the ones that will come after._

Oooo **Old friends** oooO

Knowing that they were already back when I came didn't shock me much. But actually seeing both of them was proof enough to make me hope that maybe…maybe… we could go back to what we had before; before Sasuke's sudden disappearance, taking Kakashi with him, before Naruto's departure to train under Jiraya as well…when we were kids I was always watching them from behind and I felt so small… I watched them getting further and further away from me, until I couldn't see them anymore. For a while I had Tsunade…but I still felt I couldn't face them right when they would come back, stronger and more confident. So I did the only thing that would bring me to the same podium as them… I left - to come back with pride and rightfulness. So here I am with enough pride to make a Hyuga flush… though… I'm not sure what is right anymore…_gomene…_

Those two… 7 years ago I would have punched both of them for fighting like that over small things… But for now it makes my heart warm…a little… if they'll continue this for long I'll send them on a hospital visiting tour.

Funny that even now I am standing somewhere behind. Guess it's just out of habitude – you both have now such firm and straight backs, but I don't feel the same uneasiness I did when I was a kid. No, it's ok where I am now…who would be there to watch over your clueless backs if it weren't for me?

"Woman, stop falling behind; I don't feel like looking under every rock for you for the rest of my day if you get lost."

"Aww, Sasuke – you finally realized I was a woman...I was starting to worry you will never notice."- All I could do whilst I caught up with them was to roll my eyes.

"But Sakura-chan, how couldn't he not, when your breasts-"

"Shut it Naruto!" he gulped. Good.

"And you, wipe that smirk from your face Uchiha! Your jokes are getting worse as years pass, it seems."

_That's right… the three of us… we can still get back the time we lost, so let's do our best! I really missed your laughter, no matter how angry I am that you broke our childhood's promise._

Oooo **Relationships** oooO

This is the third time I try to take a sip from my tea. Breath in, breath out… Who would have thought Hinata had the 'balls'. Festivals sure are full of events and seeing Hiashi's constant frown at the coarse young man that he has to share his family table with, surely is something that requires a lot of concentration not to laugh at. Naruto, you just set your adventurous future on fire. Though hypothetically I can sympathize with the Hyuga head…hypothetically. On the other hand I do pity Fugaku, it seems that he won't get to see any small Uchihas' spreading their clan prestige any time soon with both of his sons lacking at hormones activities. _Fu fu fu fu fu…serves you right... finally the laws of nature turned against your 'mighty clans'._

"Sakura-san did you get drunk already? You've been laughing in your cup for almost 5 minutes. And your eyes are shining strangely."

"I'm quite fine Sai, thank you. How did I end up spending the spring festival with you guys, anyway? And what was in my head when I brough Sai along?"

"That's because your boys have what it's called family duties. Though Naruto is in his probation period." Was Yamato trying to get me drunk, pouring more sake in my tea?

"Aaawww… come on Sakura-chan, you should really be proud to share the same table with important people like us, jounin."

"Genma, I don't know if I should start by making you swallow your senbonfor the '-chan' thing or breaking your left arm before it even reaches my waist."

"What's wrong Genma, rusty lately?"

"Oh, knock it off Asuma. At least I don't keep a woman next to me and pretend there's nothing between us."

Men… they always laugh at the most idiot jokes.

"Kurenai-san, don't get uncomfortable. It will only make them enjoy it more. And Sai, don't even THINK I didn't see you filling my cup with sake again. I don't know what you and Yamato are up to but I definitely don't look like a certain blond full-breasted woman, mind you."

"Well Sakura, surely no one can contradict you on the blond part but-"

"You really hate your life, don't you Genma? You just finish that sentence and I will make sure to take that burden from you." Time for another sip. "And my breasts are not that ridiculously big anyway."

"Awww...you have such a cute face when you're pouting. I can assure you your breasts are just fine. Can I fe-"

"Have you ever considered wearing an eye-patch Genma? 'Cause you'll need one after I'll poke out one of your eyes with that thing from between your teeth."

"Would you mind not talking about Sakura's breasts at this table. It feels somehow disturbing since she used to be my student and all."

"Welcome back among us Kakashi. I thought we'll have you reading from that book for the rest of the night."

"All that's left is to convince Asuma relax and drink something too."

"Humph**!** You try to drink something after spending your last days with Ibiki torturing information out of traitors and cleaning the mess left behind. With the upcoming war you should all celebrate that Sakura-san is safe back home."

Silence. "I can take care of myself just fine. What is war anyway? Who decides who are the good guys and the bad guys? As long as you strongly believe in what you are fighting for, could that be bad or wrong?"

"Already drunk, Sakura-san?" it's strange how the same Sai that can embarrass you in less than 3 words is also capable of easing the atmosphere the same way.

_I know what I stand for in war, because I strongly believe in Konoha…and I am not scared to die for it, but…what about those who are forced into it, fighting with no reason, … Why won't you treble if you are scared? Are you even scared?_

Oooo **Happy moments** oooO

It's been three days of walk. Three more days and we'll be back in Konoha.

"Aaah… my back really aches. All I want is my bed again."

But I guess the grass and the small fire will do for the night. After days of working at the hospital, to be sent on a team mission wasn't something I will send my thanks to shishou for. It was not her fault that I overreacted and crushed the smallraintown from earth's facebut I don't like to be looked down; as if a stupid mice trap would have been enough to kill trained shinobi. After the job was done (and not successfully because our connection man was sent to silence before we could reach him) we met with team Gai and team 8 on our way back. When was the last time we spent some time together? During out chunin exams? Laughing and goofing around at Ichiraku's? Seeing so many familiar faces gathered around a campfire sure brings back memories.

"I'm famished!!!!"

"You just ate, dobe."

"Hinata-chaan, you know I need to eat in order to stay strong. How am I going to protect-"

"Don't you even dare taking advantage of her soft spot Naruto" From his current cuddling at a blushing Hinata he eyed me with a spoiled face.  
"You're mean Sakura-chan. You're even meaner than Tsunade Baa-chan!" he sighed "I don't think that begging TenTen will get me anywhere, is it?"

"Shame on yourself Naruto. Taking advantage of young women, with gentle hearts and pure intention just to satisfy your greedy stomach. Ntz. Ntz."

"Gentle women, Lee? Where? Ok, so Hinata is, but I fail to see any others around."

"Ha ha ha… Kiba if I were you I would check under the blankest for kunai or poisoned needles before going to sleep tonight. Plus, even I wouldn't find the courage of insulting Sakura-chan after what she did to that town with only one bunch in the ground."

If I wasn't feeling so lazy at the moment I would have sent both of them flying back to Konoha. And lying on the ground, with a perfect clear sky was too much of a comfortable position to even bother.

"Speaking of which, that was an unnecessary action Sakura-san." With one arm under my head I lowered my eye level to watch Neji taking a lotus position at my feet, facing the fire. As long as he wasn't going to face me I found no reason to answer him and went back at star-gazing.

"But it was so cool, even teme admitted it!"

"Hn"

_What makes some stars shine more powerful than others? Is it because of their own strong will or is it that they were just lucky enough to be closer, for us to see only them? I used to chase after shinier stars too. And I still am. But I want that little star, barely shining, from far, far away… and I want to make it shine as powerful as the rest…does that make me a bad person_?

"…no-san?"

When my thought came back down on earth there were Kiba's hysterical laughers alongside TenTen's and Lee's and Hinata's giggles, obviously directed towards an embarrassed and angry Naruto, who was shoving his fists in front of a pair of smirking/ grinning raven-haired men – Sasuke and Sai. As much as both couldn't stand each other, when it came to ways of making a fool out of Naruto they turned into best partners.

"Haruno-san."

Sigh. "What Neji? If you would stop calling me 'Haruno-san' maybe you'll manage to get my attention easier."

"Hm. What were you thinking at?"

Blink; and stare. His serious expression should have made me laugh but instead it made me a little uncomfortable. Has he been watching me all the time?

"That if you keep it up with that stoic face and monotone voice you'll end up a mirror image of Sasuke's brother. Think how much you'll end up enraging the Uchiha clan: stealing their prodigy'suniqueness and reaching Sasuke's life goal without even trying."

Silence… yet again.

"This was a good one, Ugly. Is getting on the bad side of the Uchihas' and Hyugas' you new goal? Because you've managed both in just one sentence."

"Whatever…" Even if to the rest my eyelids seemed too heavy and closed with boredom I couldn't help but smile. We are really back, we are really together and I haven't felt so happy in years.

Oooo **Weakness **oooO

"They've been following us for almost an hour."

"Lets' split."

"We don't know if there are others beside the four tailing us but by splitting we'll have better chances in outplaying them without a fight."

"There's a waterfall 3 miles following north. We'll regroup there."

"Ok."

"Shino, Sakura, Kiba, Sai do you think you could head south?"

" No problem."

"Good. Naruto, Hinata, Tenten – you go north and if you're followed make sure to lose them before reaching the meeting place."

"Got it."

"Sasuke, Lee, we'll continue ahead. Everyone, move now."

-----

"Lets' hope there won't be any need of fighting." Sasuke nodded unhappy and took off after one last look behind.

------

"I don't get it. We should have just waited there and face them."

I felt like turning around and punching Kiba right in his face. I really didn't like this. It gave a bad vibe. So everything I did was to listen to their conversation.

"There is war outside Konoha's gates. You can't just jump into it without bringing the whole village with you. If avoiding any finger-pointing situation is the only way to protect Konoha then that's what we will do." Shino picked his peace to tree-jump alongside his teammate.

"Neji-san was right. We are being followed as well."

Sai added extra chakra in his feet and with one jump he advanced from behind the group, some branches in front of me, taking the lead.

"Akatsuki."

------

Razors broke the branch on which I landed and I had to drop to the ground. Sai run down the tree's trunk.

"They destroyed a village not far from here. There still are ashes and smoke in the air but I don't think there's something breathing left behind."

Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. "Where are Shino and Kiba?" "Coming our way. It seems they got an encounter with the missing nin from mist. My senses kicked in. "Sai, jump!" We moved just in time to dodge another row of razors.

"That was close." If only I had looked at Sai instead of the figure that landed meters in front of us. Unconsciously my hands turned into fists and I narrowed my eyes in anger. Black robe and crimson clouds. Why them? Why now? I hated their name and their sole existence. Back in Konoha I blamed them for taking my friends away from me. I used to blame them for Naruto's and Sasuke's decisions. When I left I promised that the day when I will come back will be the day in which I will be able to face them with cold blood. But I couldn't keep my promise. Even now they had to do it again; one way or another they kept taking the people I cherish away from me.

"Sakura! What are you doing? Get back!!"

Sai's voice vaguely reached my ears as, without even realizing, I was already in midair, fists and feet filled with chackra. The attack took the Akatsuki member by surprise as well because he had no time to avoid my frontal punch, leaving a deep gully in the ground that crushed beneath him.

It was a mistake but what is done is done. I looked towards the Akatsuki but when he wasn't there anymore it wasn't such a surprise. Then I felt a cool breeze pushing the air to the surface of the soil making the grass and the leaves in the trees shiver. I eyed Sai in a stubborn decision not to look up when a shadow covered the moon, leaving both of us in darkness. Only when the moonlight beams were lightening his porcelain face again I let out a breath that I didn't even know I was holding. I dared to look at the moon, white and pale from above. My heart was beating at a frightening speed as my conscience was telling me to stay with Sai and finish the disaster that I had just started, but all that my feet seemed to want to do is to start running as fast as my body could hold. Maybe, maybe if I'd run fast enough I could still catch him…just a glimpse. When did you become so selfish Sakura?

"Sai, I'll continue south. Please handle the situation here and go meet the others. I'll be there as soon as I can. Don't let the others panic." Of course I didn't give him the chance to replay and of course he knew that by 'the others' I meant Naruto.

----------End of chapter one -------------------------------------------------------------------------


	2. Mosquito

The song for this chapter is 'Mosquito' by Ingrid Michaelson.

Disclaimer: Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto

Chapter 2: Mosquito

Oooo **Back to square one** oooO

The first mile of running without exactly knowing where, I felt guilty. Being the one to always speak about morals, about good and right, doing something so stupid as chasing ghosts that I should have kept as ghosts, or at least as my own skeletons in the closet, I felt uneasy. And I lost the tracks long ago. But then there were the sudden explosions. So you knew I was tailing you. Idiot. As I kept running there were three or more explosions until I reached a glade and up, on the rocky wall, was an entrance to a cave.

Once inside I realized it wasn't as big as I thought it would be, the moon illuminating half of it, and half being left in darkness.

I wished I wasn't the one exposed. I couldn't see you but I knew perfectly where you stood. Gripping the hem of the glove from my right hand I pulled to make it look like a second skin.

"It was your doing… the village…"

"Quite artistic, un."

I couldn't help but narrowing my eyes. If all he aimed for was to make me look at him he clearly knew how to do it.

"_Why? Why did you do it?"_

"Orders from above, yeah. Don't tell me you don't do the same when that Gondaime of yours sends you on missions…Sakura-_chan_."

I already knew that. But what really pisses me of is the amusement in your voice as you say everything so easily.

"Did you attack any of my teammates?"

"Why wouldn't I do it? You attacked one of mine. It would only be fair, un."

My left hand turned into a fist. "It wouldn't. They're my friends and I care about them. You couldn't care less if I were to even kill one of you."

"But I would care, un…." I heard him move and take a step closer, still remaining in darkness but his features more visible. "… if it were me the one who you'd kill."

I was about to walk towards him when he stepped fully in the moonlight that came through the entrance.

"I was too bored anyway to chase after that neon that you have as a friend, un. He should really do something with those cloths. It's like having an arrow with 'I'm here, come and get me' above his head, yeah."

His face was half covered as usual by his long hair. I always enjoyed the effect that the moon's beams had on his locks, turning them from the dirty blond into almost pale silver. And I never realized how much those clear blue eyes of his could calm me each time I would open up to them.

"You still with me, un?" I watched him lifting a puzzled eyebrow and his nose arching a little upwards. I could understand his confusion when I started to giggle.

"That's not smart laughing at your enemy, yeah?"

"And at what part of your speech were you addressing me as the evil enemy?"

"Cheeeeee…" I was still smiling as he whistled and put his hands on his hips looking really comical in that cloak.

Then my smile disappeared. I shouldn't be here and I shouldn't feel so comfortable.

"Fine then. Let me try this again."

It was my turn to look puzzled. He approached me and stopped just at inches distance. I bit my lower lip. He put his hands on my hips and spun me to the right, took two more steps and blocked me between his body and the cold wall of stones. With my wrists in his hands I looked up at him only to see that his cute, mischievous smile wasn't there anymore. His face was like a blank mask and the blue in his eyes deepened dangerously.

"How about this Sakra-_san_?" his voice was husky and barely above a whisper.

I hated my body when it relaxed fully at his closure. Come on, Sakura, end this; it's time to go back to your real friends.

"Deidara…"

"…"

"…don't. Lets' just…"

"..go, un? That's what you were about to say?"

I kept my face down but it wasn't a good choice either, because I could smell his hair, his neck and the warm of his torso that was too welcoming.

"I didn't bring you here. You came on your own free will."

I closed my eyes and he loosened the grip on my wrists. Involuntarily my hands traced up his arms and rested on his chest. I inhaled deeply: he always smelled like peaches and lemons mixed with the heaviness of dust.

"This is not right. We should stop here."

At his chuckle my eyes snapped open.

"You're funny, un. I'm not doing anything. Actually I should scream sexual harassment if you continue feeling me up."

"Ugh!!You!!" I shoved him away a little bit too hard but he deserved it. Making fun of me! Even since we met, even if at first he was the clueless and innocent one he always made me blush like a 10 years old little girl. I was about to jump outside when I heard him rushing after me and pulling me back by the waist.

"Oi, oi…where are you planning to take your flight so fast, un? I didn't mean to upset you but you looked so cute to tease, yeah."

And there he goes again with the sweet, childish attitude. I **will** leave before he has the chance to get under my skin.

"Don't. Don't leave." His warm embrace tightened gently and he let his forehead rest on my shoulder, breathing slowly on my back.

So funny, those hands of his… I brought mines up and cupped them. How could hands of a murderer look and feel so delicate? I was always envious on his slender fingers, longer then mine, and maybe even more elegant. How could my hands be beautiful when they're small and calloused? I squeezed them and breathed in. There's no way of tuning back for me now; that's that.

He lifted my hands and took the gloves off. Between my eyelashes I watched as he brought them to his mouth and kissed them repeatedly. I let him turn me around to face him and still holding my hands he started to step backwards taking me back into the darkness of the cave. As he let go of my hands to take off his cloak I stood there, like a lifeless doll, watching in pain the tiredness in his eyes. _Maybe…only for a while… it will be ok if I will ease the burden from him. It's not like I would betray them, betray my village… just a bit… it's just for us… _

I stepped near him and lifted my hands to his neck. With closed eyes I let my lips meet his. It was still like him that, even after such a long time, to freeze at my actions, uncertain of what to do next. Then he relaxed and kissed me back as his hands were making their way from my hips, under my top. When he broke the kiss I half opened my eyes to see him crouching down, his blue orbs never leaving mine. After he sat on the cold pavement he started to play with hem of my pants, lifting the top in the same time, to leave short butterfly kisses around my bellybutton. The sudden sensation of wet coming from his palms made me shiver but when I was about to pull away the grip on my pants tightened and he snapped his other arm further under the top, brutally cupping my right breast. With both of my hands at his wrist I tried to discard his hand but the keen bite on my nipple left me powerless.

"Ah!"

Then, like a hungry animal he encircled his arms around my wais and forcefully enough pulled me to the ground, beneath him. My legs flexed in resistance as he kissed his way to my chest, pushing the material up with his nose, the same wet traces of kisses going up my back in the same time with his palms.

My breaths became heavy and irregular as moans of pleasure threatened to leave my throat. In both pain and ecstasy I threw my hands in his hair, ripping his head protector, letting it fall to the ground as I split blond locks between the fingers of my fists. The more I fought the pleasure from my body the rough his touches and kisses were getting. In just one move he got rid of my top, leaving me just in the bindings that he so easily ripped when he took his first bite. Supporting himself in his elbows, he stopped to look with fascination at my breasts and hard nipples showing between the loosened stripes of the white fabric. Satisfied, he hid his face in my neck, walking his lips in the valley above my stern. He didn't mind when I gripped his mesh shirtand, like an obedient child, he brought his arms up to let me flip it over his head.

The touches of his hands were pure bliss and I started to shiver uncontrollably, locking my arms around his neck and subduing my entire body to him. I closed my eyes and once with them I shut the door to everything outside the walls of this dark, humid and cold place we stole as a shelter. His hands went down again, undressing me from the rest of the clothes and then he lifted himself up to do the same. The absence of his body made me open my eyes and watch him in the pale light, untying his pants. I sat up as well taking one of his hands in mine and bringing it to one side of my face. It was amusing to watch him furrowing his eyebrows in helplessness as he realized he would have to do the job with only one hand. But I was too drunk with him to laugh. So, the same hand, I brought it to my lips and started to kiss and lick his palm tauntingly until he moaned and his tongue slipped inside my mouth. Unconsciously the muscles in his arm hardened and he struggled to get out of his clothes with only his right hand. When it was done he threw his right arm around my shoulders, biting me from the right. Soon he leaned his head on my left shoulder doing the same, as he shoved his hand hardly over my mouth, devouring its' inside with the tongue from his palm. At the sudden pain I gasped only to let him gain more access inside as I let out a muffed shriek in his hand.

"Shhh…"

From the now bruised skin of my shoulder he followed the line of my neck making me arch my head backwards for him to reach the spot he was looking for. Under the left part of my chin he stopped and started to suck harder – harder –harder.

"Mmmaaahh…" I was so driven in by lust that, when I felt his left hand for the first time, it had already slipped under my panties and its' tongue thrusted ruthlessly inside me. My eyes widened in both shock and rapture and I flung my arms at his back for support.

When my back arched forewords he placed his right hand on the ground behind me to lean more on my body, kissing each inch of skin from my chest that he could reach. My legs acted on their own and encircled as forcefully as they could around his waist. With the kunai that I kept hidden in my now fallen bindings he cut the only piece of fabric that stood between us and in a curious and painfully slow gesture he put it away. Both of his hands, now on my hips, secured me on his lap. The thirsty desire I nourished inside me for so long exploded in billion of pieces in ever nerve of my body as I felt him inside of me. My pleasure rewarded him with pain as I stung my nails in his back, slowly scratching towards his neck, leading both of us in heavy moans. From here on, time was erased from its' rights.

When the wide mouth from his chest activated I was already exhausted and my composure's walls were all down, for my body was all his, like the keys of a piano, singing each and every note that the player would command with just a simple touch.

I gently pushed him on his back, leaving soft kisses from his lips, to his neck, down to his nipples until both our breaths steadied, whilst the warm wind of that summer night started to caress our sweaty bodies and the calm, white light of the moon lullabied us to sleep on the sheets of the akatsuki cloak.

Oooo **Faith** oooO

When I opened my eyes the peaceful rhythm of your heart was the reason of my smile. Your chest was falling and rising at a quiet peace reminding me of the sweet days in which my dad would always hold up his dear child and fall asleep with her cuddled over his chest.

Soon my smile vanished and sorrow clenched on my heart.

I pushed my body up to look at the peaceful face you held in your sleep. I lifted myself a little and brought my face up to kiss away a wrinkle that appeared on your forehead.

"Please stay safe and hold on for a little while. I promise I'll come for you." Carefully I blew away some locks of blond hair from his face. Tsunade will understand. I'm sure Konohakagure will offer you protection and accept you as one of us when this will be over. They, above all should understand that war doesn't involve just enemies. War just needs an army of toy soldiers to fight. Isn't this what we all are, in the end?

"Wait for me…just a little more. Please."

With one last kiss on his lips I slowly got up, not to wake him. I gathered my clothes – or those that I still could use – and dressed as soundlessly as I could. When I stepped outside it was still night but the moon was barely visible. As I jumped on the first tree I couldn't help but think that by the time I was going to reach the others the first rays of the morning will be up.

-----------End Chapter 2----------------------------


	3. Unknown Soldier

The song for the third chapter is 'Unknown Soldier' by Breaking Benjamin.

Disclaimer: Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto

**________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________**

**Chapter 3 – _Unknown Soldier_**

Oooo **Responsibilities** oooO

When I reached their camp it was still dark, but in less than an hour the sun would rise.

I took my last jump to the ground and for a moment I stared blankly at the water hitting the rocks in its' fall.

"Sakura!"

I turned around to see Lee coming out of the woods.

After he made sure that it was really me, safe and in one piece, he run my way.

"Where have you been?!"

"I-"

"Sakura-chan!!!" All too fast Naruto was right in front of me with wide eyes and a look of concern written all over his face.

"What happened to you? Are you ok? Why did you run away from Sai like that? Did something happen? What took you so long to come back?"

The long row of questions and his worried voice made the guilt even harder to bear. I was thankfully for being cautious enough to hurry back whilst it was still dark - looking in their eyes was even harder than before.

"Keep it down Naruto. And take it easy with the questions. I am fine. What about you guys? And Sai; how is he?"

"Uhh… We're all ok. Sai too, Kiba and Shino were already there when you left. On a second thought teme got injured when he and his team got attacked."

I nodded and with a pat on his shoulder I went to check on Sasuke. I knew where the rest were because of their chakra signature. When I was about to step inside the forest Sasuke came out and waited for me to close the meters between us. His left arm had a deep gash under the shoulder but it was nothing I couldn't deal with. Avoiding his eyes I tilted my head to one side to give it a better examination. He stood there like a stone and his piercing gaze made me really uncomfortable. By the look of it, he had already tried to heal himself in a futile tentative.

"Come on, lets' sit down to fix your wound."

He didn't budge and continued to stare at me.

I sighed. "Don't be stubborn. I would really appreciate if I could get at least half an hour of sleep before getting back on road."

I was glad that he didn't oppose any resistance when I pushed him where the rest were and down at the base of one three.

As Naruto and Lee followed us, Sai and Shino jumped from their guarding places in the trees.

"Don't give him that tone, Sakura! You have no idea of how worried you got us when the guys came back without you. We had to argue with Neji to let us go after you. We wouldn't have let you there alone, you know Sakura!"

My hands started to glow the colour of blue chakra as I slowly touched the skin on Sasuke's upper arm.

"I know, Naruto. And Neji was smart enough to keep you in one place. We agreed to wait until everyone was back and not to go searching aimlessly for them."

"What took you so long to come to the meeting place, Sakura-san?"

I was expecting Neji's questions sooner or later but I was also expecting him to ask somewhere along the line – what was in your head to attack an Akatsuki and run away the next second?.

"I had to take a detour."

"And why did you have to go alone, Sakura-chan? Why didn't one of you guys go with her?"

Kiba sighed. "Sai forbidden us to. Do we look like repeating machines to you, Naruto?"

Sai? I snapped my head up to look at where Sai was. I couldn't understand. Has Sai… covered me? Why? What did he tell the others? Was I too… see-through at that moment? And since when does he know how to lie? I stared at his expressionless face and then I turned my attention back to Sasuke's arm.

"That's ok. I managed to get them lost at some point and came back as soon as I could."

When nobody asked further I knew that whichever side of the story reached them, it was matching somehow with mine.

"Ok guys. We should all get some sleep whilst we still can."

Neji approved TetTen's idea and motioned to everybody to do the same.

"I'll stay with Akamaru on watch. What do you say Lee, care to join us?"

"Yosh!"

Both of them disappeared in a jump with Akamaru on their tail.

The last one who went to where the sleeping bags were was Naruto.

"When you two are done come as well. You shouldn't even bother with him right now. I bet you are really exhausted and out of chakra."

"Go sleep, dobe."

"Che."

Oooo **Lies **oooO

Soon the hum faded and it was just the two of us and the sound of running water. The atmosphere was tense and the pressure of his stares made it worse. Suddenly I started to panic. What if he didn't buy the story? What if he sensed something? It wasn't out of his character to feel when things were off. What if there was something about my figure that I missed and could babble me? Once again I was thankful to the darkness. But it didn't make me feel any better. I tried to concentrate on his arm but his stubborn quietness was driving me crazy and I must have looked really stupid with my frowning expression. I never expected what came next. Out of the blue his other arm extended forward and his hand came to cup my chin. So I did the only thing in my power. I drew my head in a shocked and fast motion. Maybe a little bit faster that I should have, his fingers barely touching my skin. If my sudden reaction raised more suspicions he said nothing. When I looked at him he had just deactivated his sharingan. Shit!

"What was that all of a sudden? You scared me." I pretended to look back at his arm to make sure that there was no scar left as, with the corner of my eyes, I watched his other arm fall back on his knee. Embarrassed and confused about what has just happened, I wasn't going to let him answer. "There! You're all good."

I got back on my feet and held out a hand for him to grab it. I sincerely don't know what was in my head when I thought that **he **would do just so. Ignoring my help he got up on his own.

"Whatever." With that I left first.

---------

As if I could just sleep now. Since we were low on sleeping bags I borrowed Lee's while he was on guard.

My heart was still beating fast. What was that just now? He would never do unnecessary things. Unconsciously I brought my hand up to the place that Sasuke had reached for. In less than a second I froze and for a moment my breath stopped in my throat. It was the same place where Deidara had hungrily sucked on my skin.

Oooo **Daily life** oooO

Back to Konoha I started to spend most of my days working at the hospital. With the war extending worryingly fast, the village accepted to receive wounded survivors from outside. It was expected from clans like Uchiha to contest the decision and at some point I could understand their motives, but even so, sitting there and watching people dying at our gates was a selfish thing to do.

I barely got a glimpse of Tsunade lately and each time I had the chance to talk to her, either it was a bad moment or my feet would be trembling and words wouldn't pass my throat.

I was beyond exhaustion and low on chakra. The hospital was the perfect image of clutter and a headache was silently growing on me. I watched the cup of coffee long ago forgotten on the desk of the medical room, only to cover my forehead with a hand, trying to relax. I didn't know how much longer I was going to resist to the pressure.

Oooo**War** oooO

If happened so fast, during one of those overwhelming days. I was just exiting an operation room when one of the assistants came running.

"Haruno-san! Come quickly! One of the ANBU teams just came in and is in critical condition."

I started to run down the corridor with her leading my way. "What happened?"

"They got attacked by the Akatsuki." Blood dried from my face. "Shizune-san and Tsunade-sama are already there but they sent for you."

I swung open the door from the ER and I turned even pallid. The once white sheets and robes were now covered in crimson red but what sent the final blow were the injuries: most of them were severe burns. I swallowed hard and went to one of the bodies. As I was already forcing amount of chakra on the wounds I recognized the unmistakable raven hair and pale skin of the Uchiha. Panting he forced himself to open his eyes.

"If I knew I would get such a beautiful sight each time, I would gladly go injure myself more often."

At his painful smirk I tried a small comforting grin to hide my worries.

"If you promise to stick to sight seeing I'd prefer to talk Sasuke into bringing you with him when we're hanging out rather than this. What do you say Shisui-san?"

"Hn, deal." And he clamped his teeth forcefully not to scream of pain.

Shizune came on his other side to help me steady him. I didn't dare to look at her, a single glance at her dejected face telling me enough to know that she had lost her former patient.

With sweaty palms and little chakra I checked Shisui's state one last time. He would survive.

"Shizune, please continue to mend his internal wounds. I'll move to someone else.

I run to the table that I had been eyeing since I started to heal Sasuke's cousin. Two doctors were doing their best to keep him alive. As I suspected it was another from the Uchiha family, from a side branch, whose name I didn't know. I made a sign to let me take over. As soon as I did a first scan I knew it was already too late. The level of damage was beyond repair. Still, I wouldn't give up. The other doctors, still next to me, eyed me sympathetically. Just like me, they knew there were no more chances of survival for the man on the table. Stubbornly I infused as much chakra as I could but soon, with a violent startle he caught a mouth full of blood and he ceased from breathing.

Still with my hands on his chest, not caring of the blood that was now on my arms and vest, I breathed as slowly as I could.

I opened my eyes to see the lifeless body and then to look around the room. Catching Tsunade's eyes she nodded me a fainted thank you and assured me that I could go home for the day.

Everyone's head was bowed and everything I wanted was to leave the room as soon as possible.

Pushing the door open I started to drag my feet down the corridor stopping at the window from one of the corners. I clenched to its' frame for support and closed my eyes to fight the nauseous sensation that was taking over me.

Why? Why? WHY!!!!! Why couldn't things be just black and white like before? Why can't we be fighting a simple war? I wanted to scream my brain out, there and then.

I was brought back to reality by the sound of running steps. Looking up, there was Itachi Uchiha coming right to me.

He was about to ask something when he saw the blood on my cloths. With a final sigh I turned my gaze outside the window.

"I'm sorry. We couldn't save the Uchiha captain of the team."

"Shisui?" his voice was detached as always.

"He will survive. I could only manage to get him out of the critical condition but with proper help he'll be fine."

"What about the rest of the squad?"

"We lost two men."

"Hm. Thank you medic." For some reason I wanted to spin around and hit him with all the chaka that I still had. His composure in these situations, his arrogance was provoking my sanity. He should just shut his moth and leave. Before stepping away he stopped.

"Is everything alright, medic?"

No, is not alright! I have a name and you are aware of it! I hate you, and your mighty position, acting as a know-it-all when you haven't got the slightest idea of what regret, betrayal, helplessness or heartache means! Stop showing unnecessary pity when you will never be able to understand what pity really is!

"I'm fine."

Unconvinced, he still nodded and proceeded into the room that I had just left.

I wanted to spew and hide under the sheets of my bed at home. And when I will wake up it will all be a bad dream. Why can't I fight the tears anymore? What have you done, fool? Where are you now?

Oooo **Time **oooO

Konoha was officially part of the war now. There was no hope for me to reach Tsunade at least until it would go down a little.

Our shinobi were sent away on missions with the only hope that they will be back one day.

Sasuke and Naruto received some days ago a scroll form Tsunade. Soon, they were to be sent away too. The clock on my wall showed few minutes until midnight. I was lying on my bed, one foot on the pillows and my head at the edge of the other side. My loosen locks were tangling with the tips of Sasuke's raven hair, as he was sitting on the ground, his back against the bed.

Naruto was facing him, mimicking Sasuke's position, against the wall.

That night we went out for a drink and my apartment was the closest so we decided to stick together a little longer.

Suddenly we found ourselves in complete silence after laughing like three idiots over nothing special. The hot wind was coming through the opened window moving the curtains in a languorous dance. From time to time fireflies would enter the room only to leave shortly after.

"Ok! Too much drink! Sakura-chan, hope your toilet is still where I left it last time I was here because I am in a hurry!"

As Naturo jumped on his feet and run out of the room, Sasuke let out a disapproving chuckle.

"Naruto no baka! If you flood my bathroom again I'll hang you from the ceiling!!!" Hoping that my message reached him I continued more to myself. "And put back down the toilet top once you're done." I let out an exasperated sigh and threw my hand between my locks of hair scattered on the duvets.

"Guess we won't see him for a while."

"Hn."

The same silence settled again between the two. For months, since I came back, we avoided moments like this. At least I did. At first it was because I feared I couldn't control the rage I felt for him and I would have ended either insulting him or punching him. Then, it was because I felt as guilty as him for leaving behind my friends and the hardness they had to face on their own. Now, after what happened that night I was scared to let him voice his thought. I felt insecure to hear what else he saw with his sharingan.

We never spent time alone and I had no idea of how to start.

I never heard him move but his fingers slipped lingeringly along mine. He played with my hair, twisting it around our fingers. The skin of his palm was so warm. When I was little I always dreamed to hold his hand; his hands would be cold and soft like silk and it would be my right to warm them. Guess I was wrong; they are warm and calloused. I let myself smile. He really fought to become what he is today. It made me happy. Soon my fingers were playing along. I looked absentmindedly at the image of our hands. Sasuke, what would you say if you'd know that there is not your hand that I see?

Minutes passed just like that.

His fingers stopped and he turned on his knees, face hanging over mine. But I was still gazing at our hands. He brought his other hand up and wiped a wet trace from my cheek. Unconsciously my free palm covered his. My lashes were all watery. I never realized I had been crying. I looked up to meet his deep black eyes. For another couple of moments we just stared into each other's eyes. Slowly and uncertain he lowered his face until his breath was now on my lips. He stopped there to receive any reaction from me. And there was none. Sasuke was about to kiss me; that sweet memory from childhood in which my eyes would close, the old fashion that I used to see in movies; but they were wide opened. When I didn't push him back he took away the space left, only for my fingers to press on his lips on the last moment. As I closed my eyes two row of tears fell on each side of my temples, on the duvets. Opening them again I saw confusion and disappointment in those orbs I used to adore. It only hurt me more that, even if for a little, I couldn't fully erase my first love out of my heart. If things will go wrong, would you still be there to pick up the pieces, Sasuke? I broke the hold on our hands and brought mine through his hair in a caring gesture, stopping at his nape. I lifted my head form the bed and pressed my lips hardly on his forehead.

"Please, give me more time."

------

They avoided telling me, but the next day they were gone.

**--------------End chaper 3------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**


	4. Three Wishes

A.N:This is a very special chapter for me since it's actually about the meaning of the entire story. The name of this short piece of work that I wrote is _Telescope Eyes_ (an old version of a song by _Eisley_). The title of this chapter is '_**Three Wishes'**__ ,_ a song by _The Pierces_ - a extremely beautiful song that made the words of this chapter flow much, much easier and I strongly recommend you guys to listen to it and to its' beautiful lyrics. After you'll read this chapter I hope that you'll be able to see the feelings that I saw while writing it; a lovely DeiSaku relationship really needs it *childish giggles*.

May you enjoy reading this chapter the same way I did while writing it.

**--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

_"Show me what it's like to dream in black and white,  
So I can leave this world tonight."_

_------------- Unknown Soldier_, Braking Benjamin

**Chapter 4: Three Wishes**

-

-

-

"**_You...want  
Three wishes:_ "  
**-

-

-**  
**

Oooo **Colour **oooO

A month has passed since Naruto and Sasuke left. At this peace I won't be able to stand on my own feet. My mind was a mess. My feelings were ripping me apart and the only way to make them go numb was to work myself out. But now, even my body was exhausted.

It was already night when I was walking down the street to my apartment. Before getting inside I looked one last time at the stars from above, sighing. It's ok… I'll just wait for tomorrow to look for the colour of your eyes in the bright blue sky.

.

"**_One to fly the heavens,"_**

.

Oooo **Unfair **oooO

Riotous bangs at my door woke me up from the dreamless sleep I was having. Stunned I looked around not understanding what was happening. I was still in my regular clothes so I must have fallen asleep as soon as I hit the bed.

.

"**One to swim like fishes,"**

.

Still dizzy, I got up and went to open the door. There, my blurry vision registered a panting Ino. She was supposed to be on a mission.

"We... we're back! We got Naturo and Sasuke on our way back. I… they're not in a good condition but...nothing to worry…I...wait…let me regain my breath…I don't know why, but Sai told me to come and tell you as…as soon as possible… they … they had to fight against two...two Akatsuki….Sasuke almost killed one of them…Sa-…Sai and Shikamaru stopped him. They were both… brought to Konoha. Tsunade ordered immediate interrogatory under Ibiki."

My eyes widened in horror at her words and every trace of sleepiness disappeared on spot. I couldn't know for sure but my heart was beating like mad and before my mind could judge correctly I started to run barefoot down the stairs.

"Sakura! Wait! Where are you going? I said they're both fine, where are you…"

.

_"_**_And then one you're savin'  
For a rainy day –"_**

.

Once outside I concentrated chakra on my feet and jumped on the firs rooftop, the fastest way to the dungeons, the place where prisoners were kept.

During the run I hold my breath, not daring to think at all the images and possibilities that were plaguing my head. After what seemed to be an eternity I reached the prison and jumped down to its' entrance. Outside, Shikamaru was lighting one of his cigars.

"Sakura-sa-…"

I ran by him and went inside, stopping at the lobby. There, were most of the jounin and the coach was occupied by two injured Naruto and Sasuke, with Sai leaning on the wall nearby. As Naruto jumped on his feet, I stormed ahead trying to control myself from running. I went down the stairs to the last level where the interrogation rooms were located. In front of the door were positioned two ANBU. When they realized I wasn't going to stop they stepped ahead, blocking my way.

"Haruno-san, this area is strict- ". I couldn't take the misgiving anymore so when they took me by the shoulders I twisted their arms and threw them out of my way. The echo of my footsteps in the long and cold corridor felt ten thousands more powerful inside of my skull and I had to increase my peace to avoid my legs from trembling in mournful anticipation. Walking faster and faster, the corridor seemed to have no end. And then, in the darkness I saw the door, and my heartbeats were like hammers against cracking walls. Please, God, please let all of this not be real. Please let it be a mistake.

In a blink on an eye my whole world crumbled.

_" Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!!!!!!!"_

It was all in an agonizing scream. The voice and its' pain…it sent me foreword, pushing the door and slamming it open.

I froze unable to take the image in front of me. There were two ANBU on each side of the door. The shark-like Akatsuki was chained to the wall in the back and in the middle of the room Ibiki and Asuma, standing tall, with a huddled figure at their feet, face in his chest, the mess of blond hair scattered over the floor. He wasn't wearing the Akatsuki robe and my lower lip started to treble uncontrollably as both of his arms had been ripped off, lying lifeless in a corner of the room. My mouth hanged open but only muffed and swallowed sounds would come out.

"No... No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no…." I started to tremble and shake my head in panic.

Asuma, still shocked by my sudden appearance, followed my eyes and his face darkened.

"We got him in this state."

"You shouldn't be – "

The two ANBU rushed at me and seizing my arms, started to drag me out.

The more they were pulling, the more my body was opposing resistance.

"Let go! Don't touch him! Let me go!!!" No matter of how much I was fighting to keep tears from falling, my eyes were becoming more and more watery.

"Sakura!!!"

From behind I heard Tsunade's horrified yell but all that I was thinking of was to struggle free from the grip of the two shinobi.

"I SAID LET GO BEFORE I BRAKE YOUR BONES!!!!"

With a blurry vision I looked at Asuma who nodded at my shishou. Soon the grip on my arms loosened and everyone stepped aside.

Only when I was free I realized that I had to amass power to keep myself from falling. The sensation of dizziness was again taking over me, and like a man who had forgot how to use his feet I started to walk towards Deidara who was shivering in spasms. The pain in his body must have been awful because he seemed broken away from what was happening around him, deaf to all the screams and movements.

I limped to him still not knowing how have I even managed to take all the steps. Right in front of him, I wanted to call his name, but I was afraid of what I might find in his eyes once he would rise his head. Mud and gore were staining his hair and clothes. Then his body stopped its' quivered and went in complete relaxation. My heart stopped and I thought that time froze as well.

.

_" _**_-if your lover ever takes  
Her love away_."**

.

Like an old clock that echoes hardly, my heart started to beat again when a soft, whispered chuckle left his throat.

"Have I ever told you how extremely adorable are your small toes? That's one of the things I liked about you, un."

I gasped and let out an abrupt sob. Aiding himself with the muscles of his torso and legs he forced to get on his knees. When his eyes met mines I was so drained of energy that I couldn't even express my shock. His blue eyes, so clear and expressive couldn't fake easiness anymore. And the small smile wasn't enough to hide his pain any longer. When a wet drop landed on his cheek, mixing with the dried blood, he looked at me with the curiosity of a small child.

"Are you crying, foolish woman?"

He was right. My tears were falling uncontrollably and I couldn't do anything more about it.

He looked down, trying to find a proper explanation for himself, and then raised his eyes back to mine, pouting sadly.

"They wouldn't let me go with the bang. Tell them, un! Tell them I need to make art. Tell them to let me do it, un!"

I couldn't believe him; at a time like this… I shivered shortly and had to turn my hands into fists in order to control my body.

"What did you do, you fool?

Why did you let yourself caught?"

He half clucked half coughed, a trace of blood oozing from his mouth to his chin.

"You have powerful friends, un." I swallowed air when a flash of sadness glittered in his eyes and for a moment he lost his forced smile.

"I couldn't compete with them in the end. I couldn't take their… *cough* … plac- " his words drowned in the blood.

"STOP IT!" My legs gave in and I fell on my knees, slamming my hands on the ground. _"… stop already…"_

Tsunade was confused but she couldn't watch her apprentice falling into pieces right in front of her. She averted her eyes but couldn't stop herself from taking in all the mess and the blood in the room. That man, or what was now vaguely resembling a man, enemy or not, wouldn't be able to make it till morning. She looked at the two ANBU that, even with their masks on, had their faces lowered. Asuma was still looking at the two people on the floor but his clinched jaw gave him away.

.

_"_**_You say you want to know her  
Like your lover and  
Undo her damage,"_**

.

"Come on, un… don't be like that." On his knees he crawled as close to me as he could, talking into my ear. "Didn't I tell you? Art doesn't last forever. … just like what we had…_it was art_,_un…"_

At his words my chest concussed as I was trying to suck in the explosion of sobs.

"I wouldn't have it any other way, un. So you have to let it go …as well…" the blood from his chin was now draining off on my neck and shoulder. " I **want** to make it art, un. So let go."

He knew, the idiot….he felt that his body was giving up.

The tears were falling one after another and my body wouldn't stop from shaking.

"Come on Sak-… un. Don't do this." I could still follow the amusement that would never leave his voice. "Seeing you all gloomy like an unhappy child it's too unfair. It makes me want to hug you, you silly. I have already lost both of my arms. How am I supposed to give you a hug without them?"

.

_"_**_Soon, you'll find that if you  
Try to save her, it renews her anger  
You will never win, then..."_**

.

_Damn you, I won't let you humor me and take everything upon you this time. Why did you always have to do this? Taking all the pain on yourself to make me fell less resentful? You think you're the only one that knows the other's fears? I know yours too, no matter how much you want to keep them from me. I won't let you slip in silence with them; not anymore._

Slowly I lifted my arms and took him in an embrace, searching his cheek with mine.

"That's alright, you fool. I'll hold you; I'll hold you for both of us."

Unconsciously I let chakra flow through my hands. My eyes snapped open. His vital organs were all shatters. He was suffering from multiple internal bleedings and he had lost irreplaceable quantity of blood. Every move of his muscles, every breath he took was causing him enormous pain, and yet… for me... he… I tightened my arms around his body in anguish and fought the tears. I felt so helpless. I couldn't do anything but watch him forcing himself out to his death. With one hand I started to play with his hair.

"I promise you… I promise… I will hold both of us…."

I felt him hold his breath then relax on my body. What expression was he wearing right then? What would his eyes say if I were to look into them? My hand was shaking between the locks of his blond hair and I bit forcefully on my lip to stop myself from crying. My sanity went down crumbling when he started to shiver and hiccup in my shoulder. He pressed his forehead forcefully on it and his teeth clatterer repeatedly between distorted vowels. At first in sobs, he was now crying with all the power that he still had. I never stopped from tangling his hair around my fingers as I felt the taste of blood in my mouth.

"I'm scared kunoichi … it scares me…dying now… I never thought it could happen to me… but now… now I don't want to die anymore… not now… I want to stay, you hear me??? I want to stay!!! It scares the shit out of me! I don't want to go. I DON"T WANT TO DIIEEE!!!" I was trembling beyond control and tears were gliding down my cheeks, but I continued to gently stoke his hair to cease the pain away.

"I know… I know…shhh…"

His screams stopped but his body was still shaking.

"Shhhh…."

"It's unfair…un" his whispers were tearing my heart apart. _It was unfair from the start. Our meeting was unfair, our feelings were unfair, our touches were unfair… Everything had been unfair to us. Was there a moment where we could have turned the tables and make it right? When did we miss it? Where did we go wrong?_

_It will all end soon. I won't let you suffer any longer… it's…unfair._

I pressed his body on mine and covered him as much as I could. I felt the chakra leaving my skin. _It will all end soon…_

I hold him as tightly as I could. When his breath steadied I knew it had begun. His nerves were starting to get numb.

"It feels so funny… my body doesn't hurt that much anymore. He he.. I can't even feel it for sure…"

"Shhh…"

He moved his head and brushed his lips against my ear.

"Neee… don't take all the pain on yourself if you won't be able to live with it… don't be greedy."

I nodded but refused to open my eyes. He kissed my cheek lightly and rested his temple on my shoulder, hiding his face in my neck.

"Tell me something funny…"

…

…

"Each time you are not hiding your feelings from me you forget to use your 'un's"

…

He clucked "…un."

and closed his eyes.

"Deidara …I-"

_"…aishiteru"_

The signals from his heart died.

I should have opened my eyes but darkness was everything that I could still stand. I gripped even more forcefully the body from my arms and buried my face in his hair. I abandoned myself to despair and started to dangle backwards and forwards, backwards and forwards, backwards…

Asuma had enough. He looked at the devastated woman in the doorway and at the akatsuki still caught with chains. He wasn't going to cause any problem for the time being. He made a sign to the two ANBU to leave the room and the same for Ibiki who was reticent at first.

"Everyone out." The Gondaime gave a last order and was the first to turn on her heels. Asuma stepped out, closing the door after him with a click.

.

-----

.

His skin felt so warm on my neck. It was like one of those days when he would nuzzle his face away from the sun like a spoiled child after he had been awakened from a nap. He was just resting... he would soon wake up and smile his way out of my annoyance. He was…

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!"

The heart-rending scream echoed through the humid corridors of the prison.

------

.

_"_**_We'd be so less fragile if we're  
Made from metal and our  
Hearts from iron and our  
Minds from steel and if we "_  
**.**  
**

Outside Naruto was about to punch Sai for stopping him all this time from following Sakura when Tsunade appeared. He wanted to jump at her to ask where his friend was when almost everyone noticed the look she was trying to hide under her hair. Kakashi put an arm on his shoulder hoping that the woman would stop to tell them what was going on. But she never did. Soon after, Asuma came. He faintly nodded at them and got his pack of cigars from his pocket. He leaned against the wall of the building but as he brought up one of them, his hand was slightly shaking.

Kurenai approached him, taking the lighter from his hand and helping him out.

Everyone waited in silence for the man to find his words. He brought a hand up and covered his eyes, trying to knead his temples. No one was expecting to actually see a tear running down his face.

"Something like that… no one should see it." he laughed sadly. "I don't remember when was the last time I felt so void inside. It's … heartbreaking."

Kurenai had no idea of what he was talking about but there's one thing that she felt right to do. She brought one comforting hand on his shoulder. "Asuma…."

"What is war anyway? Hnh! That's exactly what she asked us… People always pity the dead ones…but the really pitiful ones are the ones left behind, alive."

" '_I don't want to die'_ … because I don't want to leave the people who care about me… wasn't it so? Isn't it the same for all of us?"

.

_"_**_Built an armor for our  
Tender bodies, could we  
Love each other, would we  
Strive to feel? And..._****_"_  
.**

Between his fingers the cigar was burning away, long forgotten, the smoke fading in thin air.

---------------------_**End **__------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Sincerely yours,_

_Lexa._


End file.
